“My Wish is to Become a Smartphone”

It’s little milkie’s first day of school! And I’m currently at home, waiting for the time to fetch little milkie from school.

How’s things so far? Well, the morning was relatively smooth, with little milo not insisting on his YouTube watching (we forgot to hide the remote control yesterday night). But will probably have to adjust on the timing again as sending little milo to school first might cause his sister to be late for school.

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Parents Setting an Example

Of late, it had been especially interesting to see the actions and behaviours of my baby. Nothing was taught and yet she picked it up on her own such as, saying “Excuse me” when you blocked her path, wiping the floor when you gave her a handkerchief or tissue, keeping her toys once she wants to stop playing with them.

It’s good. All these are good habits, but that’s provided if the parents are there to set a good example. To be exact, it’s not just the parents, it’s more of all the caregivers or people who the baby sees often.

Babies are like sponges, they follow what they saw and learned it without you realizing it. Out of nowhere on one fine day, my baby started digging her nose. Why? Apparently she saw her grandmother doing that. It’s funny, of course, at the first sight of it. But it takes a while to get her to “quit” that deliberate habit, which might in turn, really becomes her habit.

I’ve also seen and heard from friends telling me that friends of their children spoke vulgarities at a very young age because their parents does that. They won’t really understand what it meant. But probably will just take it as something to be said if you are unhappy.

Really, it’s a very simple theory. If you expect your children not to do something, you have to stop doing it first, otherwise, the children will start to question the reason. If you want them to respect you, be the good example for them to follow.

Parenting on the Same Side

I saw my baby throwing her tantrum and then the daddy started scolding and hitting her hand slightly. She turned to me, crying for help. I carried her and explained to her softly on the things that she can and can’t do, and then to apologize to her daddy. Am I doing the right thing?

I’d never taken “parenting” very lightly, especially after what I’d seen of my cousin, whose parents (my uncle and his wife) had been quarrelling and always on the opposite side, and still is, for the past 13 years. All the while seeing how my cousin took advantage of that situation, since when he was young. He didn’t turn out that bad, thankfully, but he could probably have been better.

It’s actually normal for a couple to go against each other. You can’t really expect 2 person to always agree, isn’t it? But no matter what, they should never do that when it comes to disciplinary of their children, especially when it’s a fact that the child really did something wrong. And worse still, in front of their children. So what happens when parents are always against each other?

Children are smart and they can absorb, understand and come out with their own “theory and conclusion” based on the things that they see or hear. And soon enough, they will know that they are always being “protected” by either side if their parents are on different side. For example, if the dad scolds, the mum will come to their rescue and argue with the dad or vice versa.

So is it good to be on the same side? Actually, there’s good and bad. Good in the sense that there won’t be any conflict, and the direction for the child is clear, as in, what is “can be done” and what is not. Bad is when both started scolding at the child, which simply drive them to a corner, feeling helpless, and probably not loved.

What am I trying to say? Have one person to be the bad guy, and the other be the one to “guide” them in a gentler tone, in the same direction. If any conflict really arises, just remember never to do it in front of the children. Of course, this is definitely not applicable if any abusing seems to be in action.

Anyhow, I’m back to hushing my baby.