Past #0138

I’m crying again. I don’t feel good. Not a little bit at all. I sent JY off yesterday. Saw her too. She was crying when he left. I gave her a hug. Didn’t want to see her cry. But in the end I couldn’t control it myself… *sob* I cried for the whole journey back to my hall. Wasn’t good. I reached, she sms me. We chatted for hours till 6am. Nothing in particular. But I’ve come to realise that it’s not possible for me to totally treat it as nothing. I talked to her, I felt the pain after that. It comes back. Though I kept saying ‘it doesn’t matter anymore’, it actually does… *sob*… it does… to hell it does.. a lot.. I slept for an hour after that, woke up and went for my econs tut & quiz. Bad. I cried on my way back, in room again. I couldn’t help it. I dunno why but… now I’m crying again.

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