par·a·noi·a (pr-noi)

  1. A psychotic disorder characterized by systematized delusions, especially of persecution or grandeur, in the absence of other personality disorders.
  2. Extreme, irrational distrust of others.

am i suffering from that? its been a while since i’ve had that feeling… the feeling of insecurity. the feeling of tearing everything apart. the fear of losing someone you love. i hate that kinda feeling. i really hate that.

i’m… not normal now, definitely. something is wrong. my thinking. my behaviour. i need help. but who can i look for… i don’t like her. i seriously don’t like her. i hate it even more when i saw her that day. felt like squashing her and give her two tight slaps. stupid girl. tolerated for one whole year… i’ve had enough. better don’t let me see her again. i’ll flare up. i really will. i know i will. one whole year of project with her is enough. its school work, i can’t do anything. don’t EVER let it be work or business.. i’ll really flare up. i mean it. *takes a deep breath*

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