First and foremost, I’m DEFINITELY not encouraging people to have extramarital affairs. I’m only setting some expectations here, known or unknown, because I’d personally heard of several cases where people expect lots from the other party, as if they are in a NORMAL relationship.
Hey, wake up, you are not in a normal relationship. You are probably married (or attached), or else, he/she is, and maybe still is.
I got a not-so-big-shock when I saw a text message early this morning while I was doing my “business”. A friend, X, had for the second time (after not so long ago), an affair with a married man. *facepalm*
It wasn’t unexpected, from all the signs that I picked up every now and then whenever I talked to her. It’s easy, really. Though expected, it still took me a while to accept the fact that she never learned anything from her first lesson. And this one seems to be worse than the previous.
Then, I’d already told her not to expect too much. One can’t expect the other party to give you all the attention you want, especially if the other party is already attached, worse still, with a family (and kids). If you want such relationship, then take things lightly, do not expect to get all the attention you want, anytime of the day. Do not expect to be loved and cared for, the other party is not obliged to. Do not expect to be the one and only one, and be the first priority. No, and most likely you will be the last. If you can’t get these straight and not forgotten in you head, my advice to you is, don’t even go into one.
There is totally no point and perfectly dumb to constantly argue with a married person (not to you) and ruin your everyday. But if you enjoy being with that person and keep your expectation low, and insist on going ahead, fine, go ahead. The bottom line is, you must be happy!
Leave. I know. Easier said than done. Agreed. But if you don’t even try, then you are as good as a gone case.
Sigh… I seriously hope she listens to me from now on, instead of ignoring my advices, for finally at the end of it all, who should be the one that will be there for you other than your spouse (hopefully)? What is the purpose of those vows? Is it really merely a piece of paper? Yes, it is (to me). The paper is indeed just a piece of paper, but it’s the meaning of that whole process where 2 person promised to… (blah blah blah…) that matters…