Ah!!!!!!!! It’s no good! I am not in a good mood today. The mind is totally off. I am freaking tired. My head is bursting! How?!!! Knowing that I only have a handful of leaves left definitely is not helping. Crap. Crap.

Something is changing. My body is changing. Recently my rashes came back out of nowhere, just like how it suddenly disappeared a decade back.

Am really trying hard to gather myself. Slept earlier last night and woke up early today. It’s 7.02am and I’ve planned my day. Will try and keep it up. There are simply just too many things to do, I can’t waste anymore time.

Thoughts are still jumbled up. Am gathering all my strength to focus and squeeze the droplets together. I need a clear direction. Bit by bit… at least I am moving… though I probably have to move a little faster than this pace.

Felt sabo-ed. Working from home today. By right it’s the whole team, now it’s only me. Pissed with the lil’ hub. Pushing all the responsibilities to me. I need to start planning.

Back to work. Boss sent me the list of new items that she planned for me. Am I gear up for it? 13 months. I need to get out of this comfort life to fly. This life is not for me.

Sunday. I woke up early today and went to visit my aunt in the hospital with my sister. Other than the fact that she looked really skinny from the last time I saw her like a week+ ago, she looked quite alright to me

I sat on the bus, making my way to take the exam for the last module. And then suddenly the tears just flow out uncontrollably. I, am not as strong as you think I am. If you recalled, I have not cried much since little milo’s was hospitalised for that 5 days. He needed me…

I held my breath and stare at those numbers that appeared on the screen, which doesn’t make much sense to me, as the doctor continues to explain what she is measuring. 2.08mm. It looks like a small number. Doctor said it’s good for the left side. She’s going to check on the right… a small…